A close up of the torso of Melissa Mariposa showing her red nails, curves, and sparkling Jessica Rabbit dress

Formalités

Decorum

Pay attention, there will be a test later

My Expectations

I expect you to be polite in all correspondence, clean and well groomed, provide proof of a recent COVID jab, arrive on time or inform me promptly of any lateness.  It is my expectation that you’ve read this website and will not bring your altruistic contribution in a plain white envelope.  I hate white envelopes.  A card, book, tin, or a leather envelope are a few suggestions but feel free to get creative or just use the ATM envelope.  Anything but a plain white envelope.

I believe in treating others the way I wish to be treated and I know that both your time and money are valuable. I expect full honesty during screening from patrons.

Your Expectations

You can expect to find a beautiful woman bathed in candlelight.  Freshly showered and sweetly scented, wearing light makeup, with French toenails always dressed for whatever situation we are.  You will find that I am as at home at the opera as I am an art opening, the ballgame, a Rally race, a tech convention, or zip lining over Fremont Street.  You will find bright eyes, a wide smile, and a warm heart ready to melt the troubles of the day away.  You will find someone who can both listen and talk.  Lead and follow.

I am infinitely adaptable.

Deposits

A small good faith deposit is required to firmly secure your time.  Deposits can be made both painlessly and in a number of ways to preserve your discretion.  I have done my best to simplify this process for you.  Appointments without deposits cannot be guaranteed. I will see you if I can, but the only way to hold a spot is with a deposit.  Please enquire via email for more details.

If I cancel the visit, you will be fully refunded your deposit. If you cancel the visit, I keep the deposit. If you lie during screening, I keep the deposit for wasting my time.

Cancellation

Life happens and I appreciate that you respect my time enough to ensure I am not out of pocket if you should need to cancel

Within 3 days of the visit: 50% of the scheduled time.

2 days or less: 100% of the scheduled time. 

Exceptions to this policy can be made for legitimate emergencies with proof of the emergency in question. I am not a monster.

All visits may be rescheduled instead of cancelled for NO FEE. If you reschedule less than 72 hours before the visit I appreciate that as a gentleman you pay costs I incur as a result of hotel/flight cancellations.

Treat Me

If you wish to bring a gift, I have a wishlist for your pleasure.  In addition to that, I love all things handmade (doesn’t have to be by you).  I also appreciate leather envelopes, hollow books, non-hollow books (memoirs and poetry are my favourite).  

If you wish to bring libations know that I am a very light drinker, at best.  I would suggest bottle of Armand de Brignac (your pick) for us to share.  If you’re looking to bring something more red, please bring a Cabernet Franc (Inkblot preferred) or plan to be drinking it alone (which I do not mind).  I do also enjoy Inniskillin Ice Wines with my favourite also being Cabernet Franc or any of their sparkling ice wines.

Philanthropy

If you want to make my heart sing, these are all organisations near and dear to my heart.  Our lives are but a speck of dust in the grand scheme of this existence, and our entire purpose on this earth is to make it better for the next group of people that come along. We live in the age of arrogance, and we can only move out of that by recognising it and doing more for others. The only way I see to do that, is by improving the lives of people who are alive today and need help so that they can build better futures to pass on.

NCWIT
Anita B
Lysistrata
TechWomen
Black Girls Code
Red Canary Song
Feed My Starving Children

OAQ

For the occasionally asked question

What is the difference between the Mariposa Experience and a regular visit?

The Mariposa Experience is for those looking for something a little more adventurous, and a little less ‘typical’ ranging from special outfits, acting out scenes, and more.  This covers almost any special request you may have.  I reserve the right to deny a request if I am not comfortable.  In that event you do not have to pay for the Mariposa Experience, just the standard contribution for the time we spend together.  I am very open minded, laid back, and non-judgmental so please do not be embarrassed about what you’re looking for.  But also never put it into writing.

Do you see men of colour?
I absolutely see men of colour.  Variety is the spice of life and I cherish and appreciate men of all backgrounds and ethnicities.

Is there extra screening for men of colour?
No.
Do you see couples?
Absolutely.  One of the greatest thrills for me is to be able to enhance an experience for a couple.

Is there an extra fee for couples?
No.  I genuinely love seeing couples and do not charge any additional fee.

Do you only see straight couples?
No.  Couples of all orientations and gender identities are welcome.

Do you see lesbians, NB/GNC, or trans women?

I absolutely provide companionship to you regardless of gender identity.  I have always cared about the who more than anything when it comes to people I spend my time with.

Is there extra screening?

No.

Do you do FMTY?
Yes, though I actually prefer driving unless you’re over 700 miles.  I find luxury in having the freedom to stop, relax, take photos, eat a meal, and really enjoy the trip over the awful mess of the airport shuffle.  At my peak I was flying 55 times a year which is as hectic as it sounds, and when I started driving again I realised how much I missed the unrestricted travel of the open road.  Plus, rental cars are automatic.  I hate automatic.

What are your FMTY requirements?
Usually a 4-6 hour visit depending on where you’re located.  If you’re on the opposite side of the country, it’ll be longer.  Just reach out and talk to me. I do require business class or first class if flying and I have a gas stipend calculated for trips that I drive.  I need time in the morning to work out at the hotel gym and get ready for our day as well as time to myself in the evening for my skincare routine. Other than that, I’m all yours. I don’t have a phone to check, so you’ll have my undivided attention.

Do you have or accept reviews?

I think most “reviews” of people’s time together end up being works of fiction and great dramatization to get free credit on a certain website. I’m sure some of them are 100% real, but I’m sure most of them aren’t really what happened.

I prefer you do not write them unless they are clever, funny, and non-explicit.  I’m not a robot that performs the same for each person, and I don’t want to set unrealistic expectations from others based on your words.  I am de-listed from most major sites at this point and a certain site banned me for not liking reviews when interviewed about it, so feel free to submit them but I assume they’ll reject them.

If they’re an important thing to you before you see me, I totally understand. We live in a review driven society and you want to make sure you’re getting a quality experience. Google my name and reviews in quotes.  You should find what you’re looking for. 

If not:

  • My profile on ECCIE is still active.  I haven’t had a review in awhile, but that’s mostly because I don’t see many people who like writing reviews.  If you would like to leave one, feel free.
  • You can see the list of reviews I had on the other site here.  You can’t read them, but you can see they existed.  I de-listed when they said you couldn’t give a 10 to someone without specific activities and they banned me when I said in an interview that I found that to be a bad practice.
  •  Here are some kind words from patrons in Vancouver wishing I was back.
  • This enthusiastic gentleman once started an effort to get me to Winnipeg.
  • I did an AMA on reddit once.  I can’t do all the work for you though so if you want that one, you’ll have to dig a little.


I hope this is enough to assure you that I am genuine and enthusiastic about what I do!

Do you accept references?
As a supplement, yes.  But not as a sole form of screening.  If my screening doesn’t work for you, we are regrettably not compatible.  Please do not ask me to compromise my safety for your comfort, that is the definition of uncouth.

Do you give references?
Absolutely.  I will give a reference for up to 6 months after our visit.  Do you really want me to keep info on you any longer than that?  I think that’s poor OPSEC, don’t you?  While we’re talking about OPSEC, I wrote a guide for that!

Did you make your own website?

I sure did.  In 2018 I opened Red Umbrella Hosting which I later added “and Design” to.  My goal is to bring simple, attractive, affordable websites to providers.

What is your design background?

I bought an old HTML book at Goodwill when I was 13 and started writing code on paper.  When I got home from school, I’d put it in the computer.  This was one of my first creative outlets and led to my interest in making art.  To me, websites are just another form of expression no different than painting or sculpture.  One of my 2022 goals is to spend more time refreshing my skills in this department.

What does this site look best on?

I worked really hard to give both a quality desktop and mobile experience.  While I rebel against using a phone, most of my viewers are (around 80-90%), and as such the site is tailored around what looks and loads best for them.  That said, there are a few extra treats for those using desktop. 

Do you really game?
Since I was 5 years old and given a hand me down NES.  I was raised on retro consoles (NES, SNES, CD-i, and PS1) so I have a fondness for games from this era.  There are some modern games in my collection, but not as many. 

What games do you play?
These days I travel a lot, so I play a lot of things on my Switch.  My top games on the Switch (by hours played) are Diablo 3, Monster Hunter: Rise, Animal Crossing, Attack on Titan 2, Golf Story, and Diablo 2.  These only scratch the surface of my collection.  I love campy indie games as well and am also willing to try anything you buy!

Can we play games during our time?
For sure.  Just tell me in advance.

Can we play games online?
We sure can.  I offer vGFE packages for chatting, gaming, and spending time together outside of visits.  They make a great ice breaker or help fill the space in between visits. 

Do you really not have a smartphone?
I genuinely do not have a smartphone.  Just never got into them when they came out, and I haven’t seen a convincing reason to get one.  I don’t feel I could enjoy anything on a screen that small and I can’t type on them at all.  It seems like a huge waste of money to have to buy a new piece of fragile glass every couple of years and I can’t lie…it feels like I’m paying to be tracked and having my data sold.  It’s just not for me.

I did *use* a smartphone during my Capstone project to do mobile livestreaming (easiest device to use) but other than that I’ve never really done much with them.  I think its been off for almost a year now.  When I pick mobile livestreaming back up, I’m planning to use my IRL backpack with an old iPhone connected via wifi to read chat.

What if I bought you a phone?
I would immediately remove the SIM card (if it had one) and probably never connect it to the internet unless it became a chat reading device.  It would primarily become a point and shoot camera to make content with.

Can we talk on the phone?
I do not offer complimentary phone calls before a visit.  I do offer  voice chat through Discord as one of my virtual services.  Voice chats start at 150 and must be scheduled in advance.

How do you get around?
I look at the directions on google maps before I leave so I know generally where I’m going and then I get there.  If I really need to, I use the built in GPS on my car for more refined guidance.

What about mobile apps?
Wifi tablet + VPN

What if you need to call 911?
I have a flip phone in my glovebox, and one in my kitchen.

What devices do you have?
A sick desktop, a very comparable gaming/editing laptop, and two older Macbooks from uni (program requirement).  Between the four machines I have Windows, Mac OS, and Linux covered and all in 4k.  Does it make sense why I don’t really want to bother with a phone?

Tell me more about the desktop?

  • AMD Ryzen Threadripper 2950X
  • MEG X399 CREATION
  • 32GB Corsair Vengeance LPX DDR4
  • NVIDIA GeForce RTX 2080 Ti (Founders Edition)
  • Seasonic Prime PX-1000 (1000W 80+ Platinum) PSU
  • Samsung SSD 970 EVO Plus M.2
  • HD60 Pro Internal
  • Sony A5100 + HD60 External
  • Audio-Technica AT2035
  • Yamaha MG10XU
  • 3DIO FS XLR
  • Asus ROG GX950 Mouse
  • Kinesis KB600 Advantage2 Keyboard